Love Bites

Dear Sasha,
   
My awesome wife of 10-plus years wants to sleep with women — correction, wants us to sleep with women. This makes both of us hot and bothered, and we’re going to try a threesome. More so, my gal wants us to hire an escort, which I’m also cool with.
   
We’re trying to educate ourselves on the sex trade and have been looking at many locally based escort websites, but don’t know how to determine if a service provider is good — specifically,  one that doesn’t exploit vulnerable and marginalized women. We want our escort to be a willing, consenting professional. Any tips on how we can be sure that whatever provider we go with treats its employees/contractors with dignity and respect?

Lucky Boy



Dear Lucky,
   
You have clearly been looking for a companion through agencies. What I can tell you is that women who work through agencies only make a certain percentage of what you pay them. This is a choice many escorts make because they don’t want to have to screen their clients, drive to their calls or book them. The complaint I hear most from agency girls is that they wish they were making more money, but the facts are laid out before them — there are no hidden costs and they can go independent if they choose.
   
Independent companions do all their own screening and booking. They choose their own web designers, their own photographers and generally write all the copy for their websites. What this means is that you can get a better sense of who they are or at least how they choose to present as workers. If you are curious about the services they offer, you may ask them directly or you may search the review boards for details of their services. The review boards also contain details of agencies. CERB (The Canadian Escort Recommendation Board) or MERB (Montreal Escort Review Board) are two reputable boards.



Dear Sasha,
   
I’m a 33-year-old woman who has always identified as being heterosexual and have only been with men; however, over the past few years I’ve started to accept the possibility that my sexuality is a bit more fluid than I had originally thought. I’ve met women who I have been attracted to and wondered what it would be like to be intimate with them. I have no idea how I would go about initiating such an encounter. I have friends who are lesbians, but I’m a private person and I’m not sure that I feel comfortable eliciting help from them in this endeavour. Any suggestions?

Bi Mary, Not Binary



Dear Bi,
   
I respect your reluctance at engaging your lesbian friends in this caper, Bi, but also understand if they felt a little put off by your desire to experiment. The tourist thing — it can be a little aggravating. I would keep this to myself, if only so as not to deal with an onslaught of criticism that may be disheartening.
   
There are many dating websites where you can be upfront about your "curious" status. I would suggest sticking to the ones that are open to all orientations and looking for women in a similar mindset. 
   
Questions? Comments? Contact Sasha at pouledeluxe@yahoo.com.